I want to premise this entry by saying that I have no problem with people who get cosmetic surgery. After all, I live near Bondi Beach. There's plastic everywhere. It seems to fuse with the sand and sea to create a sensual mass of semi-naked limbs that is Bondi in summer.
What I don't get is why older people get cosmetic surgery in the hope, I can only imagine, to stay youthful. Hello! News flash! It doesn't work. You only have to see the tragic pics of Cher in recent years to realise that. Nor will whacking an injection of collagen in your lips help. The only thing it does is earn you the moniker 'trout mouth', and while a trout mouth may look good on a trout, it doesn't look good on a human. I'm sorry, but you don't look like Angelina Jolie!
Phew, now that I've spat that out, maybe I should stop to think about this a little more. When I was younger, I used to look at old women who put makeup on and dyed their hair (often a strange blue or purple – what was that about?) and think, why bother?
But does it really matter what someone chooses to do to their body if they can look in the mirror and like what they see?
Maybe, just maybe, people, like Cher, get cosmetic surgery to feel good about themselves? Perhaps they don't give a shit what other people think, as long as they can look in the mirror and see a gorgeous goddess, or god, staring back. If that is the case, good luck to them, I say.
Yet, if they get cosmetic surgery in the vain hope to regain youthfulness, my advice is: give it up! Here's an idea: instead of focussing on how to look like you did when you were 20, focus instead on how to feel like you did when you were 20: exercise, have sex, eat good food, have sex, hang out with great friends, have sex, travel, have sex, go for a skinny dip, have sex, learn to love what you do (if you don't, change it), and, oh, did I mention, have sex.
In these uncertain economic times, sex is free, it feels good, it's great exercise and it puts a bounce in your step... a slowdown in the economy may be just what we need to give us the time to enjoy more sex. How's that for a positive spin on the recent – and ongoing, it seems – economic turmoil? Can't pay the mortgage, can't feed the kids... but, hey, we can still have sex and it'll leave us feeling years younger, to boot. (Just don't forgot the contraception if you're heterosexual.)
But I digress... some of you are probably thinking, stuff that, it sounds like too much hard work, just give me the surgery, thanks. In that case, I'd just like to say, choose your surgeon carefully, and if that doesn't work, make sure you have a back up plan. Ever thought of joining a circus?
1 comments:
Its very different over here in the grotty inner-west (as opposed to the tendy inner-west). I rarely see plastic on faces. Although Carmel Tebbut drove past me today, I think she was driving her son to school, and I thought - her skin is impossibly beautiful. What's the rules on plastic surgery on politicians?
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